Managing a body versus living in one
When rejection happens, as it inevitably does, your nervous system is flooded with uncertainty.
No One Wants to Be Cured of Who They Are
Philip Bromberg has a sentence I keep coming back to: "No one will allow themselves to be cured of who they are."
In the last post I wrote about his idea that an eating disorder isn't a malfunction but a split-off part of the self, one that learned to control what it was never helped to regulate. This post is about what that means for getting better.
What Can't Be Regulated Gets Controlled
Real change comes from slowly tracing the preoccupation back to what it's actually protecting you from feeling.
Why Do I Feel Like Something Is Wrong With Me?
Most people think of boundaries as a task problem: the meeting you learn to decline, the favor you finally say no to, the project you hand back instead of absorbing. Task boundaries are the easy version of the problem, and you've probably already solved for those.
Emotional boundaries ask something harder — knowing where you end and someone else begins.
Why Do I Feel Like Something Is Wrong With Me?
When rejection happens, as it inevitably does, your nervous system is flooded with uncertainty.
Why Doing Everything "Right" Still Doesn't Feel Safe
Is it possible to feel lonely while sitting right next to your partner? Explore the "unthought known" and learn the difference between painful loneliness and the healthy solitude needed for true intimacy.
Why Do Emotional Boundaries Feel So Impossible to Set?
Most people think of boundaries as a task problem: the meeting you learn to decline, the favor you finally say no to, the project you hand back instead of absorbing. Task boundaries are the easy version of the problem, and you've probably already solved for those.
Emotional boundaries ask something harder — knowing where you end and someone else begins.
How Do I Deal With Body Dysmorphia?
Real change comes from slowly tracing the preoccupation back to what it's actually protecting you from feeling.
